I wish I had known; life after childhood abuse.

I am happy now, the road has been bumpy and could have been made easier. Here’s what I wish I’d known during those times.


As a survivor of physical, sexual and emotional abuse, what would I tell my teenage self?

  • You are smart, never put yourself down again.
  • Stop hiding.
  • Bullies will stagnate, you will flourish.  Stuff ’em.  Not in 20 years and after counselling, but right then and there, tell them to go stuff themselves and never look back. You are magnificent. 
  • Other peoples troubles are their own.  Empathy, yes.  Giving up your freedom for their happiness, no.
  • Don’t give people your money because you believe their story.  They believe their story.  It’s still a story.
  • The best way out will be education.
  • Nobody’s told you this yet, but if you are not good at something straight away, practice makes things easier and you improve.  If you find maths hard, practice it a little more.  Don’t just do the homework to receive the mark and move on.  Learn how to master the principle.
  • That kid you’re playfully teasing for being a swot, you’ll wish you were him on exam day.
  • Go to University – even if your teacher pulls that ummmh face to derail you, no matter what it takes and no matter who opposes it.  Find a way.  Again, other peoples troubles are their own.
  • Spend less than you earn.
  • Have fun where you are.
  • Take the taxi.
  • Curfews are for idiots.
  • Let them worry, you are fine.
  • Shake it off and move on.
  • Buy that house you wanted.
  • Buy the second house you wanted too.
  • Buy those other houses you could afford but were talked out of because you thought other people must know better.
  • Move abroad when the opportunity presents itself.
  • Buy the VW Golf, not the Ford.
  • It works out magnificently because you demand it to be thus.


Author: Pollyanna Whyte

Single LDS Mormon Mum/Mom living in England. This is my blog on emotional health, fun, parenting, life, divorce, starting over, friends, family, church things, and budgeting. Stop by, tell us what you think, feel free to share (but credit the source please).

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