Peace I leave with you is a real thing

“Never surrender to the darkness your attitude of gratitude” and great will be your peace.

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Peace I leave with you,

My Peace I give unto you,

Not as the world giveth

Give I unto you.

Let not your heart be troubled,

Neither let it be afraid.

(The bible, somewhere!) (I know where it is really).

I think we might all agree it has been a tricky, teeth gritting, set your stance and see it through kind of 45 years.

It’s been bumpy, it’s been joyful and less joyful in equal measure.

Continue reading “Peace I leave with you is a real thing”

The Holocaust vs the Call of Duty generation

There was only one teen in the class affected appropriately by the footage of extermination camps, and it was the same teen who didn’t play violent video games.

There was a teen who is studying History at GCSE level.

It was on the curriculum to review video of the extermination camps as part of the coursework.

A German walked up to a Jew in this archive footage and shot the Jewish person in the head at point blank range.

The Jewish man fell to the ground, dead.

Only one child in the class flinched. Continue reading “The Holocaust vs the Call of Duty generation”

Sleep remedies my depression

I found one way, which is free, to manage any future episodes of depression. Can you say “goal oriented optimist”?

When I feel the brain snuffles, depression, coming on, the faster I can take a nap the better. It is a reset button. It gives me time to process that which is in the old brain buffer. It gives me a physical and emotional time out.

Now, I am a cantankerous and oppositional old mare at the best of times and rarely do what is good for myself, preferring instead to “push through” which gets a lot of household chores taken care of which we are calling a “good thing” this week but the longer I avoid extra sleeping, the more sleep I will need  to compensate for my bull headedness later and the less say I will have in the when and where’s, so really I am shooting myself in the foot.

I am allergic to the useful medicine which would typically be used to alleviate depression symptoms so have to do this au natrel.  Believe me, if I could, I would be down the pharmacy faster than you could say “Where did Pollyanna go?  She was just here…” Continue reading “Sleep remedies my depression”

Throw out your back, I dare you.

There’s a quick way to find out what is important and cannot wait, versus what you can completely forget about.

Good morning,

I’ve devised a quick way to figure out what’s important, what can be left for an hour or day or so, and what can be completely forgotten about.

I’m not sure you’ll all go for it but here it is.

Throw your back out.

No really, it’s the quickest way to help you determine what really cannot wait vs. what you’d normally do.

If putting on your clothes requires all kinds of leveraging implements, you determine pretty quickly if where you are going that you’re getting yourself all gussied up for is really worth the effort.

If your saucepans you need to prepare dinner are stored in the lower drawer, all of a sudden a dingable dinner from the freezer sounds mighty appetising at mid-torso height. And as for dishes in the sink, we can buy new!

All kinds of choices abound…. breathing versus blinking, pick up your handbag or just leave it and hope someone hands it in one day, 250mg ibuprofen vs 500mg paracetomal (duh).

Definitely sorts the wheat from the chaff.

Try it, you might like it.

It’ll be ok in the end.

Today is a good day for a good day. (Thanks for that nugget Joanna Gaines!)

Things work out, boilers get kinda fixed (if you don’t count the worsening leak the plumber created – at least we have heat), children dry and put away the dishes eventually like they’re supposed to, laundry ends up back in the wardrobe in a wearable condition, work (knock on wood) goes fine, kids will wake sufficiently to make it to the car in time for Seminary, feelings mend, life moves on – slowly at first but then you notice that nothing has changed yet everything is different.

So even on the black dog days, and offsetting the risk of another zombie apocalypse passing through town, and if all the cards stay where they fell for a while, you can hope for a pretty good today and an even better tomorrow.

It’s not the end yet, and it may be some time arriving but often times, good enough is good enough.

Romance as a future possibility.

I want to date and I SOOOO don’t want to date. I am ready and I am not. It’s complicated.

You remember when we used to be clueless about when people did or didn’t like us… and then there was the family and marriage and stuff so we didn’t have to think about that for 24 years pretty much (give or take a squabble or two), but then the marriage ended and so dating as a future probability became a thing on the agenda again? 

Me too.

The thing is, during that intervening period, one would have hoped to have become more in tune with who does or doesn’t like us and whether or not they were goodies or baddies. 

I’m here to share that there is no such thing as the “having-a-clue fairy” and I’m here to declare that people do not come colour coded with black or white cowboy hats, gosh darn it. Continue reading “Romance as a future possibility.”

When people tell you your faults.

I could have been spiteful in retaliation, or I could practice my dignity skills. Retaliation is more satisfying in the short term.

Sometimes people tell you your faults.

Sometimes they get on such a roll that they have to stop to catch their breath before they can start again like a sprinter getting a pain in their side and holding on to a lamp post and stretch it out before starting again.

Sometimes what they have to say, although harsh, may be rooted in a trace of truth.  But it’s the kind of truth where someone takes a good thing, puts it through the wringer, jumps up and down on it for a while, drags it through the mud and then presents it back to you as a truth.  There’s a trace of the original there but it has become twisted and tainted.

Sometimes, because there was a trace of truth, it stings.

Sometimes it’s just vicious.

Someone close to me took it upon themselves yesterday to tell me as many of my faults as they could squeeze in within a two minute window. Continue reading “When people tell you your faults.”